HOW many?

I get asked that question a lot.
How many kids do you want?
I think people are semi cringing when they ask me, thinking in the back of their heads, do these people know what birth control is?, they have got to be out of their frigging minds! 
And, while I assure you we do fully know what birth control is, we do NFP for anyone wondering :)
I still do not have an answer to the question of how many.

5 years ago Jordan and I went on our first trip as a couple to the ranch. It is our now yearly tradition with his family. The ranch is more than just a destination it is a marking point for where it all began. 5 years ago it was just us and our fluffy crooked eared puppy, back when we thought we had life figured out to a tee! (weeks after that first trip a pink plus sign appeared) propelling us into the REAL world! Fast forward to this year and us at the ranch with our 3 boys and another in the oven.
{out take from family pics at the ranch} haha

 Did that really ALL just happen in 5 years? Sometimes I am a tad in shock when I look back and realize ALL the things that have happened. But then at other times I am just a tad impressed that we are still rocking it out and taking this life we have by the horns and running with it! 

Back then if you would have asked I would have told you in 5 years we would have one, MAYBE two kids. MAYBE.

I grew up with just a brother, 2 of us. Jordan grew up with a sister and 2 brothers, and when his dad remarried another brother and 2 sisters joined the group. Funny side note is that my dad is one of three boys, they are even closer together in age than ours, but my grandma obviously didn't dare try for more than 3, maybe she knew something I am missing! haha So obviously we came from different number of siblings family but for us the number was really up in the air from the get go. I think we have just went with the mentality of we will know when we get there. 

For us, 3 kids works, I will let you know about 4 in a few months! haha! I actually found 3 kids to be an easier transition than 2! I think mainly because you are so used to having your hands full, what's one more? I am hoping the same transition for baby #4.

Really when it comes down to it, we just leave it up to God. He has never steered us wrong thus far into our lives. Even with the craziness we have been through aside from just having kids; Jordan starting and completing his MBA, switching jobs, relocating twice, me starting a business, God has really been there running the show. We have been so fortunate, truthfully.

I love my boys, they are the best thing about me, they represent Jordan and I's love. I truthfully do not know where we will draw the line on number of kids. I think we will slowly figure it out. What I do know is that it's not as crazy as you think, or maybe I am just insane, trust me I never imagined so many kids so quickly and if I were watching from the outside I might say, wow these people are nuts. But when you are living it, it's not as crazy as everyone makes it out to be. You get in a rythhm and figure out how to make it all work. Shockingly enough, we do more now than we ever have. With just one kid I was so nervous and hesitant that I pretty much didn't get out and experience life. And now, we are always on the go, trying to get these boys out to explore the world ahead.

So, maybe 4 will be the magic number, I really can't tell ya. Jordan and I are still very young, I am only 27, so truthfully saying we are going to stop is semi laughable. At the end of the day any time I say "this could be it", we end up pregnant. At this point it's truthfully up to the Big Man, like I said, He has never steered us wrong and at the end of the day raising the future generation of God loving little people is so important. We need strong-faithed, hard working people in this country now more than ever so maybe God just sees Jordan and I as great parents and wants us to raise them well so they can change lives in the future, at least that is what I tell myself when I get stressed haha!
(please check Vincents outfit, he is wearing Jude's shorts and a backwards tee bahaha)

The future is ours and it is still undecided. What I do know is that we will be happy. And at the end of the day that is all I can ask for. Happiness, maybe some craziness but deep down, lots of happiness no matter how many kids and cars we need to transport those kids. 



15 comments:

  1. Great post!! 5 years ago I figured I'd have 2 or 3 kids by now and here I sit one and done and totally happy with our decision.

    It's funny how things work themselves out.

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  2. I have a friend who has 5 children, she had a stillborn and was pregnant with triplets and lost one of the babies. I really don't know how she does it since 4 of them are under the age of 4 but her daughter (who she had at 17) is a really big help. If I could afford to stay home, I think I would want more than two kids. I think big families are really neat and my mom and dad both have three siblings. But for now we will see how this first one goes :)

    People always have to have something to be curious about but if it works for you then who cares!

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  3. I love that first picture! It's such an accurate portrayal of life with boys! I love this post, too! People are always so nosy although I will chuckle a little if you end up tooling around town in one of those large passenger vans a la Kate plus 8 ;)

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  4. Truly enjoyed reading this post and Vincent's outfit was very creative!! Love you all!

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  5. You have a beautiful family that's just getting better after every bambino! ;)

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  6. Your children are all so adorable! Everyone is different, I know I am totally happy with my two and will not be having more, but I'm sure if I didn't have a chronic pain disorder and had half my stuff together like you that'd be a different story haha.

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  7. Allie...Trust me...you'll know. For us it seems that five might have pushed us to that "we're done" place. I know this because with five I often wonder if we (as parents) are appropriately meeting every child's needs. When you start wondering that (or feeling) that some important stuff may be falling through the cracks you'll "be done".

    Here's the weird thing about this decision. It's personal. Everyone is different. My choice to have five doesn't mean I think someone else's choice to have two...or ten...is some sort of referendum on OUR decision to have five. Unfortunately, people (especially moms...hence the typical mommy wars) often assume if you make a different parenting decision, you are somehow judging their decision to be inferior. That's when you end up with passive aggressive (or sometime just plain old aggressive) comments like, "Have you ever heard of birth control?"

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    1. Perfectly put, Carolyn!

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  8. I had 2 in 2 years. We decided to wait until the youngest was a year before )trying again. ( didn't need a 3rd c-section so close). We would love another but we are having trouble staying pregnant.
    Still very hopeful.

    It is good to see people who are happy and not letting others dictate their lives.

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  9. Your family is beautiful, and I agree with the other comments, it is personal and you know when you know. I have gotten the same comments. I had 3 in 4 years and I just turned 26. But my husband and I wanted them all close. There are large gaps between my siblings and we just aren't as close sometimes because we cannot relate to each other. I see my boys and how close they are and love that. My baby is 2 months old and I have no idea if we are done, guess it depends on the craziness of the day. haha!

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  10. Great post! Your boys are blessed to have you! I think you were meant to have a big family and you are carrying it out beautifully. :-)

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  11. What a genuine post that is so personal. I admire your freedom in knowing God is the one who's ultimately in charge.

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  12. We just talked about this yesterday after reading the catechism's info on family size. Though with my fertility issues, we may always have to actively 'try', we are hoping to be able to just take the let go and let God approach at some point. I think it's a beautiful way to build a family if you can do it that way (but of course don't judge anyone who uses NFP to TTA or TTC as we have used it for both!). You have a beautiful family!

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  13. over the past year we've eased into using NFP completely to not have children (having two in under a year and baby iggy being so early scarred me into really trusting it at first), but now i just use the ovuline app, and it's been working so far!! Our approach is to not try to have kids knowing one or more is bound to sneak in over the years, and we're okay with that haha

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  14. I just found your blog and really like it. As you do NFP you might like the natural family planning board at www.delphiforums.com. It's a catholic forum with a very diverse population. You might like it. I look forward to reading here more.

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