3:30 am

I tossed and turned in bed hoping that the crying I heard was in my dreams. The crying continued. It was Sam and sadly the minutes went on and I realized that he was not going to go back to sleep! As I started to get out of bed Jordan woke up so I asked what time it was.
 3:30am.
Come on now Sam!
Clearly that memo I sent last week wasn't read.
The do not wake mommy unless you are sick one.

Alas, I drearily drag my self out from under my warm covers and make my way to his room. He is full blown pissed sitting in the corner of his crib. I picked him up and took him to our room and nursed him back to sleep. About 4:00 I took him back to his crib and climbed back under the covers with my phone. I just wasn't sleepy so I started scrolling through Facebook and also downloaded the new documentary Fed Up to watch since I knew I wasn't going back to bed. While I was waiting for the movie to download I clinked on an article a few moms had posted. 

I was blown away. I have 4 children and never once did I think about it that way. The article was spot on. It shared that we as parents are so busy worrying about how OUR day went and what we could check off our to-do list and we rate our day solely based on those things. Instead we should be basing the day through our childrens eyes. I am a HUGE offender of chalking my day up to a failure if I don't get everything done. So yes, most days are a train wreck because my to-do list of motherly and wifely duties is NEVER ending and never done.
I laid in bed and reran yesterday through the eyes on my boys vs through my eyes. Yesterday I walked downstairs to Luke and Jude playing video games at like 7am. They are obsessed with Sonic, and then I walked into the kitchen and saw Jude had also helped himself to some ice cream bars. The wrapper and nuts from the sundae cone were on the floor. Come on son, cover your tracks! I of course was so annoyed but can you imagine HOW AWESOME their day was so far?? Hello, they strolled downstairs in their PJs, grabbed some ice cream and were plopped down in front of the TV playing Sonic. DREAM LIFE for a little boy. I also think about last night when I read the same book over and over and I honestly wanted to be doing a million other things around the house since it was already past bedtime but now looking at it from Jude's eyes, his mommy read the funny book again and again and again. HOW AWESOME! So this morning when Sam woke up at 3:30 am how amazing was it that mommy came in to feed him and comfort him. We shared a special time just the two of us, cuddling and snuggled up. Much better way to look at it then dreading the fact he woke up.

When Jordan woke up I told him about the article and we just laid there and laughed about how HOW AWESOME life is from Jude's eyes. The kid I see as a stress factor and mess maker galore is actually loving his life. Although he makes messes, he is learning and figuring life out. I do not know why this article struck me so hard, maybe because I am delirious from lack of sleep or maybe I just needed a wake up call. Seriously, no pun intended. Don't do this again tomorrow Sam! 

But honestly, I am a huge offender over here of relying on my feelings and my never ending to do list to measure how successful my day was. Instead of being upset that I didn't get my workout in, I need to look at the fact that I got to spend extra time with the boys outside or playing in the toy room. So read the article and give yourselves a break over the laundry and the dishes. The only thing I am showing my kids right now is that it is okay to get upset and stress out over not getting stuff done. Ummm that is the EXACT thing I do not want my boys to do. I want them to be calm mannered and not flip a lid when things don't go right. But I need to lead by example. I need to show them that even though the day wasn't perfect on paper, it was still an AMAZING day. 
I saved the post to my phones home screen and will most likely read it weekly! So, from this point forward let's all work at not summing our day up all based off our to-do list. I am not saying just throw that to-do list out the window at all but take a step back and look at your day from someone elses perspective. I want my boys to have the most amazing life possible and I want to be as present as possible in their lives. Instead of seeing Jude's God awful messes as a day ruined I need to take a breathe and make it a learning moment for him. Me flipping my crap over the mess is not the answer to the problem, but me helping him to learn in a calm manner will in turn make him *hopefully* handle situations better. I need to stop looking at this life as mine, and starting looking at it as OURS. Jordan, Vincent, Luke, Jude, Sam and even Verners! And sidenote, Verner must have the best day ever when he poops on the carpet and sneaks up on the couch for a nap. That little monster. 
Life is good. Sometimes you just have to switch the glasses you are looking through. 
xoxo

Also, if we are not following eachother on Instagram, we need to be!!! I post there so much more and also post all of the kids shenanigans. It's a more raw look into our messy and crazy life.
@alliedarr 

3 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing!! I had a few weeks of trying to stay caught up on the dishes and laundry and I didn't like how it felt. I realized I wanted to leave those things and enjoy my kids and I have!

    ReplyDelete